Short Funny Stories

[Dario]

Post Your Short Funny Stories Here! :D

Also, Make Sure They Are Appropriate, Don't Want The Thread Deleted.

[Dario]

Will's Experience at Gatwick

After his return from Rome, Will couldn't find his luggage in the London Gatwick airport baggage area. So he went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that his bags hadn't shown up on the carousel. She smiled and told him not to worry because they were trained professionals and he was in good hands.

'Now', she asked Will, 'has your plane arrived yet?'

[tvkid5000]

- When you are counting objects, you go "0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,A,B,C,D...".

- When asked about a bus schedule, you wonder if it is 16 or 32 bits.

- When your wife says "If you don't turn off that darn machine and come to bed,then I am going to divorce you!", and you chastise her for for omitting the else clause.

- When you are reading a book and look for the space bar to get to the next page.

- When you look for your car keys using: "grep keys /dev/pockets"

- When after fooling around all day with routers etc, you pick up the phone and start dialing an IP number.

- When you get in the elevator and double-press the button for the floor you want.

- When not only do you check your email more often than your paper mail, but you remember your {network address} faster than your postal one.

- When you go to balance your checkbook and discover that you're doing the math in octal.

- When you dream in 256 pallettes of 256 colors.

---Not Exactly A Story but its good enough.. and heres a LOLcat to top it off---
http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2009/07/funny-pictures-cat-wants-a-deep-fryer.jpg

[Dario]

LOL!!! @ The Photo...

[TrueRedDevil]

The Britt, the Russian and the Finn were walking around in the Sahara Desert.
Soon, the trio noticed that they had gone lost.
Wandering around hopelessly searching for water, they managed to find a pool, in the middle of the desert.
They both ran as quick as their scorched feet could, arriving at the pool.
But soon, to the disappointment for the group, there was no water in the pool.
All three fell on their knees in despair, as a man suddenly walked to them and said:
"The pool fills with anything you'd like, just say what you want it to fill with before you jump in!";)
With lightning speed, the Britt arrived at the pool and said "Tea" and the pool was filled with tea. :D
Soon, it was the Finn's turn. He shouted "Lapin Kultaa!"(=a Finnish brand of beer...) and the pool was filled with beer.:cool:
Now, it was finally the Russian's turn. He ran to the pool, fell, swore "дерьмо"(=sh!t) and fell in.:mad:
End of story.

[Sixaxis]

LMAO. Nice one True. I'll post a story and a pic.

A young man goes into a drug store to buy condoms.

The pharmacist says the condoms come in packs of 3, 9 or 12 and asks which the young man wants.

"Well," he said, "I've been seeing this girl for a while and she's really hot. I want the condoms because I think tonight's "the" night. We're having dinner with her parents, and then we're going out. And I've got a feeling I'm gonna get lucky after that."

"Once she's had me, she'll want me all the time, so you'd better give me the 12 pack."

The young man makes his purchase and leaves.

Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her parents. He asks if he might give the blessing and they agree. He begins the prayer, but continues praying for several minutes.

The girl leans over to him and says, "You never told me that you were such a religious person."

The boy leans over to her and whispers, "You never told me that your father is a pharmacist."

http://i681.photobucket.com/albums/vv179/Sorrowz/Xat/1246670524959.jpg

[Dario]

"You never told me that your father is a pharmacist."

LMFAO!!!, That Just Made My Day ;]